Pastor Kurt

Pastor William Kurt is a Lutheran minister we met with after Spring walked out on mediation with Lisa Guider and filed for divorce. I had begged Spring to reconsider the divorce and she suggested, demanded really, we meet with Pastor Kurt who she knew through family connections. I suspect that she expected that Pastor Kurt would “take her side” unlike what happened with Lisa Guider. We met extensive with Pastor Kurt at his church over a 4-5 month period.

Pastor Kurt was an interesting person. Having grown up Catholic in a Catholic/Jewish neighborhood I had never known many Lutherans despite the fact that Minnesota has a large and vibrant Lutheran community due to its strong Scandinavian heritage. Also, as is common in Minnesota, Pastor Kurt sent his own sons to a Catholic high school, the very same one my eldest would start at that fall. His church also held a lot of events with a nearby Catholic Church. I did enjoy some of our discussions on the differences and similarities between the Catholic and Lutheran Churches. I really had no idea that the mass and doctrine followed by Catholics and Lutherans was so similar.

As for mediation, Pastor Kurt, whose wife was a reformed alcoholic, focused on Spring's drinking to her dismay. More that that he ended up telling her that her actions in lying to me and forging my name were sinful. Spring even told him that she agreed with him on this but I highly doubt she really did considering her later actions. He also told her that her behavior was passive-aggressive. Spring did not take all of this well. She stormed out on him several times.

Finally at our last meeting, Pastor Kurt wanted to get everything out in the open and asked if we were both willing to have an honest conversation and not hold anything said against each other. Spring agreed. He then told her that we needed to get to the root cause of our issues which were Spring's handling of money and her drinking. Spring walked out and restarted the divorce process.

Pastor Kurt is a good person and really tried his best. I am grateful to him for his effort. In hindsight, I am not sure anyone could have saved the marriage given Spring's mental state.  

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