Saturday, May 6, 2023

The Fiction Of Alimony

I ran across a page on alimony in a divorce mediation website from a law firm in Massachusetts  specialized in divorce mediation. I cannot help joking they are quite divorced... from reality. 

Practically speaking, alimony represents an attempt by the court to solve two very real issues that lower-earning spouses often face in a divorce:

  1. To avoid leaving one spouse “empty handed” after the marriage when that spouse provided uncompensated work during the marriage, such as raising children or homemaking.
  2. To avoid forcing a spouse to suddenly fend for him or herself in a working environment (in which they are unfamiliar and unprepared) after the spouse dedicated years of his/her life to the marriage at the expense of their own professional growth.

Not true, at least normally true in reality. If it were true. why would my ex-wife, who was not the primary care giver for the children during the marriage and who was able to earn just a much as me obtain such a huge amount of lifetime alimony? 

I understand I am just one case but I have talked to a lot people who have gone through divorce and looked at a lot for the statistics which assure me that my experience is pretty normal. 

Alimony is not about justice. It is an often a criminal game to see who can take the most from the other. Those willing to commit crimes and other unethical actions have a clear advantage. By willing to lie and commit fraud my ex-wife was able to extract close to $2 million from me. All it cost her was her self-respect and the respect of and relationship with the children. 

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